Thursday, January 01, 2009

She's no Dixon Edwards

Celebutante Caroline Kennedy made waves when she let it be known that she'd like to the next junior senator from New York, a seat soon to be vacated by Hillary Clinton.

Since then she's proven can I put this delicately...not the most intellectual Senate hopeful we've run across (just imagine the uproar were she a Republican).

The good thing about such vapidity is the humor value, and she gave us some priceless material with a now-infamous New York Daily News interview:

"I'm really coming into this as somebody who isn't, you know, part of the system, who obviously, you know, stands for the values of, you know, the Democratic Party." ...

"I know how important it is to, you know, to be my own person. And, you know, and that would be obviously true with my relationship with the mayor." ...

Her speech was often punctuated with extra "you knows" and "ums." ...

"Andrew is, you know, highly qualified for this job," she said. "He's doing a, you know, a great job as attorney general, and we've spoken throughout this process." ...

"You know, I think, you know, we're sort of, uh, sharing some of this experience. And um, as I've said, he was a friend, a family member, and um so, and uh obviously, he's, you know, he's also had an impressive career in public office." ...

"It's really, you know, it's not about just the Kennedy name."

There's some audio of this gold out there somewhere, and it's been determined that she uttered 12 "you knows" in 49 seconds. No word on whether there were any doubles or triples, but that's a slugging percentage of at least .245.

Sure, Dixon Edwards or Roger Pavlik could beat that in the course of ordering lunch, but they aren't trying to get appointed to the Senate now, are they? Hopefully the HardLine will pay homage to this genius when they get back from vacation.

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